Did you say it?

Isn't the world we live in such a weird cautious place? Name a place that is just like it with creatures who think the way we do? Does the animal kingdom have the same struggles as us when it comes to relationships? They say we evolved from apes, but do they go through the same mess we call 'dating'? I'm now what I believe is a serious relationship. Well that brings up another thing. Relationships. What's a serious one and what's not. I don't believe it's a relationship when you are just sleeping together, yet people will describe their relationship as 'seeing each other'. So what does that mean exactly? We all seem to have our our meanings for these words. I once dated (well I thought we were dating) who said we were casually dating. I was confused and asked what she meant. She said that it was us getting to know each other and still having the physical side of things as well. What She failed to tell me was that to her casual dating means that she was also casually dating other guys at the same time. It lasted about 2 seconds after she told me.

So back to my serious relationship, what makes it a serious relationship you ask? We started off dating (I still believe we are dating), getting to know each other etc. We weren't dating anyone else. We did kiss and hug, we weren't having sex. This frustrated me at first, but we actually had a great honest conversation about it and made us a strong couple. I guess it also set the foundations of our relationship, that communication and honest would make us work. 3 weeks into our relationship it was clear that we were head over heals for each other. Our side under the vine pergola we sat drinking a lot of wine. I looked at Katie, smiled as she smiled back and whispered to her that I was falling in love with her. She said the same in response. A month later I find myself in a tough situation.

For the first time in 7 years I found someone whom I am in love with. Yes I said, I will say it again. I am in love with Katie. Right now she is in England spending 3 weeks over Christmas and New Years with her family. It hurts not seeing her, like a deep painful heart aching hurt. Yet when she calls I can't help to smile and get excited because I am able to hear her voice. I sent her a message a week ago that said something along the lines of, "When you get back I will tell you in three simple words how I feel about you." Her response to it was that it was a sweet message. What does that mean? So now I am stuck. Do I or do I not tell her that I am in love with her. I don't want her to feel pressured by it yet at the same time don't want to say it and not have her say it back.

So do I say it? I love you. I don't ever want to live without you. You changed my life. Do I say it?